I’ve always been a late bloomer – mentally… My body was an early bloomer (5′ 7″ and a C cup by the time I was 12), but my mind couldn’t keep up. I wasn’t into boys until I was in high school. Didn’t get my first kiss until I was 17. Didn’t have sex until I was 19.
I never thought I would get married and have kids. Never wanted either. At least that’s what I thought. Just as my 35th birthday passed, I started seeing babies and having this feeling. I couldn’t recognize the feeling; I had no idea what it was. It took a while to come to the realization that what I was feeling was my biological clock turning on and ticking like crazy. It was odd… I still wasn’t looking to get married, but suddenly the idea of having a baby seemed like the one thing I was missing. Super. Strange.
I talked to my mom about it. I knew that she’d never approve and that disapproval would break the spell this “thing” had on my mind. Goodness, was I ever wrong. My ever prim and proper mother loved the idea and asked me when I planned to make this thing happen. I could have been knocked over by a feather. Maybe this wasn’t such a stupid idea. I begain researching cryogenics labs and the process of artificial insemination. The timing couldn’t be clearer… my mom would soon be retiring and was open to working as a nanny (no free grandma-ing for me!) when I went back to work. I have a great job (though I think I should start looking for a new one… with less travel and way less stress).
So now I sit, with about two months until my planned insemination. Trying to find a sign that I’m making a mistake and not seeing a single one.